Friday, October 31, 2008

Parenting Cry for Help!

It has been a while since I’ve written about parenting struggles, but here I am again. I feel like every day is a war, filled with small skirmishes over anything and everything. Not every single request is met with “No!” but a significant portion are. I don’t know if it’s because the kids have been so long without routine and chores, or what. I’ve bought a book called “Parenting with Love and Logic” which I hope will help me understand how to improve, but I haven’t had time to read it yet!

People in my Oxford church who hear that I’m homeschooling look at me like I’m crazy, and they say that they’d never be able to get their kids to do anything they said. I’m no different from them. Unfortunately I often resort to threats. But I don’t think that the answer is to send my kids to school and avoid the root issues. I’ve seen families function with peace, respect, obedience, and helpfulness. I’ve seen it with my own eyes! So I know my family can be different from the way we currently are.

And then during the good times, it’s so sweet and wonderful that I want to treasure the moments forever. I truly do love my kids and love being home with them. I just need the proportion to increase more in favor of good times!


ErinOrtlund said...

I don't know about you, but I find it's worse the more stressed out I am. You're going through such a huge transition, I wonder if that's a factor?

I've heard good things about the Love and Logic book! Let me know if it helps.

Charity said...

I hope you finally get a chance to read Love and Logic. For me that was the begining of something good with my kids.

I use something like a treat system with my kids. Except they have to build up to their treat. Lots of different ways of doing this. Add up the stars to get their treat. My kids put marbles in a jar to get it up to a certain mark. You can publish a list of things to do to earn their marbles or stars. Or you can just fly by the seat of your pants and reward them when their behavior merits it.

You could get a measure of control to tide you over to when you have time to put real measures in place.

I'm praying for you girlfriend. I totally understand how it is with little people. Totall get it.