This time when schools have been closed and people have been working from home has been a gift to our homeschooling family in some unusual ways. After years of feeling so different and so little understood, now a majority of our friends are at home as much as we typically are, and finally seeing what it's like -- both the good and the hard.
It's interesting to hear others now speak of the great benefits of our normal lifestyle. They find the unrushed mornings a Godsend; they rave about the change from harried busyness to slowing down and doing things with their kids. They mention how nice it is to wear elastic-banded pants and not feel pressured about hair and make-up. They notice reduced commute times and increased family time. They bake and cook more from scratch, often out of necessity, but surely enjoying the fact that unrushed home-cooked food is often tastier than the alternatives. They've breathed great sighs of relief as they've spent more time outside and gone for family walks. They've even seemed to notice that yes, indeed, kids do grow and learn without constant adult oversight, especially without sitting-still-desk-work.
Can I just say how refreshing it is to finally hear people acknowledge and enjoy many of the reasons we love homeschooling? My teens love hearing from their friends, statements like, "Hey! It's fun doing school on my bed!" and "I didn't even get dressed til afternoon yesterday!" I love hearing people close to me say how much they like being with their kids all day. Even an article in Christianity Today had the writer admitting that she doesn't want to go back to "the way things were." Given this extended change of pace, she realizes how unhealthy and unhappy her previous harried existence was.
However it's not all cheery warm fuzzies, is it? I've also found it affirming and relieving to hear others finally get how HARD this lifestyle is. Admittedly it's a little difficult for me to feel sorry for folks when this has been my struggle for so many years. When I hear spouses moan about having their partner working from home all day every day, for just a few weeks, I want to scream, "This has been my life for the past six years!!"
Ever since my husband began his PhD program (and actually for a number of years before that, just not all consecutively), he has had nowhere he must be every day. He's had plenty of work, of course, but he's been in our home for much of the time. In fact, once his classes ended 4 years ago and the priority became preparing for comprehensive exams, researching, and writing his dissertation, he's been in our home almost every single day. We don't have a big house (no office, no basement). We don't have a second car. We don't live in an urban enough environment to easily walk places like a library. And I'm already home all day with homeschooling kids.
It has been tough.
It may have been the toughest thing about the past few years of our family life. The finances have been hard. The uncertainty has been hard. The high pressure of metro DC living has been hard. The stress of a PhD program has been hard. But being on top of each other in a small space has been super, super hard. For him, for me, for our marriage.
I know these are first world issues. The ability to work from home and teach my children has been a privilege. The fact that I moan about having my husband at home is also a sign of privilege. But it's my life. It's my joy and my pain. And now that the country is under "lockdown," I don't feel quite so alone.
It's interesting to hear others now speak of the great benefits of our normal lifestyle. They find the unrushed mornings a Godsend; they rave about the change from harried busyness to slowing down and doing things with their kids. They mention how nice it is to wear elastic-banded pants and not feel pressured about hair and make-up. They notice reduced commute times and increased family time. They bake and cook more from scratch, often out of necessity, but surely enjoying the fact that unrushed home-cooked food is often tastier than the alternatives. They've breathed great sighs of relief as they've spent more time outside and gone for family walks. They've even seemed to notice that yes, indeed, kids do grow and learn without constant adult oversight, especially without sitting-still-desk-work.
Can I just say how refreshing it is to finally hear people acknowledge and enjoy many of the reasons we love homeschooling? My teens love hearing from their friends, statements like, "Hey! It's fun doing school on my bed!" and "I didn't even get dressed til afternoon yesterday!" I love hearing people close to me say how much they like being with their kids all day. Even an article in Christianity Today had the writer admitting that she doesn't want to go back to "the way things were." Given this extended change of pace, she realizes how unhealthy and unhappy her previous harried existence was.
However it's not all cheery warm fuzzies, is it? I've also found it affirming and relieving to hear others finally get how HARD this lifestyle is. Admittedly it's a little difficult for me to feel sorry for folks when this has been my struggle for so many years. When I hear spouses moan about having their partner working from home all day every day, for just a few weeks, I want to scream, "This has been my life for the past six years!!"
Ever since my husband began his PhD program (and actually for a number of years before that, just not all consecutively), he has had nowhere he must be every day. He's had plenty of work, of course, but he's been in our home for much of the time. In fact, once his classes ended 4 years ago and the priority became preparing for comprehensive exams, researching, and writing his dissertation, he's been in our home almost every single day. We don't have a big house (no office, no basement). We don't have a second car. We don't live in an urban enough environment to easily walk places like a library. And I'm already home all day with homeschooling kids.
It has been tough.
It may have been the toughest thing about the past few years of our family life. The finances have been hard. The uncertainty has been hard. The high pressure of metro DC living has been hard. The stress of a PhD program has been hard. But being on top of each other in a small space has been super, super hard. For him, for me, for our marriage.
I know these are first world issues. The ability to work from home and teach my children has been a privilege. The fact that I moan about having my husband at home is also a sign of privilege. But it's my life. It's my joy and my pain. And now that the country is under "lockdown," I don't feel quite so alone.
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