I know that my kids are aware of many of my issues ... my anger, my despair, my easy frustration. I see them react in different ways, and it makes me sad that they have such a messed up mom. But then we have bright moments of glimmering joy, and I hope that they remember...
I hope they remember the bat walks we've taken at twilight, even putting pillows down on the path by our creek, so we can more comfortably enjoy the interesting creatures swooping over our heads...
... the countless hours we've spent reading all kinds of books together, a sweet bedtime routine and a way to pass long hours in the car. Little Women, Watership Down, Narnia, Lord of the Rings, The Penderwicks, Huck Finn, Tales of the Kingdom, Roll of Thunder Hear My Cry, Anne of Green Gables...
... the walks we've taken in the snow, enjoying our footprints, watching the falling flakes, sliding on icy surfaces...
... many hours at Pohick Creek, wading, climbing 'The Boulder,' spotting snakes, hiking for hours, and even creating sparks by throwing rocks at a boulder at twilight...
... trips to the beach in almost every eastern seaboard state as well as California, Canada, and other countries, jumping waves together (even when I wore an XXL swimsuit), building tunnels and castles in the sand, seeing sharks and jellyfish and ghost crabs, watching sunrises and sunsets, collecting kelp...
... songs sung together, loudly with our stereo or radio playing, softly with my guitar at bedtime, in harmony with extended family as Grandpa expertly played guitar, in church every week...
... homemade meals made with love, bringing us together at almost every meal, pleasing our senses as we've smelled bread baking and tasted cinnamon rolls, African stew, or hand-crafted pizza...
... that I said "I'm sorry" when I'd messed up or hurt them, and that I said "I love you" and gave hugs at least every night...
... being encouraged in their gifts, being spoken of proudly, being told they're loved no matter how well or badly they do at something...
... the freedom they've had to explore, take risks, enjoy creation, and be themselves...
... the changes I've made in better eating and finally exercising on a daily basis. Maybe the weight I lost and the health I gained will be an inspiration to them when they face something tough, or they have to decide between a healthy or unhealthy habit...
... the fun of hospitality and the joy we had in hosting friends and strangers for overnights and meals...
... the love of extended family, and the many visits they've had with cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents, great-grandparents, and great-aunts and -uncles. I know it all starts to blend together, and they may not remember the specifics, but I hope they remember they are cherished and rooted...
... that learning can be spontaneous and fun, and stem from the very world around us, that understanding history is key to moving forward in a healthier way, that math is crucial in every walk of life, that science is a wonderful exploration of the breathtaking world in which we live, that art and music are the languages of the soul, that the written and spoken word are precious and world-changing...
... that the Church is beautiful in its diversity. We've worshiped in Mennonite, Lutheran, Presbyterian, Baptist, Anglican, Pentecostal, Methodist, Covenant, Christian & Missionary Alliance, non-denominational, traditional and contemporary, 'high' and 'low,' Scottish, English, and Jordanian churches, in English, Arabic and Spanish, and there's been truth and beauty in each one...
... the respect we tried to always show to those who served us, and also the honor we gave to people in or from other countries. Our time overseas was when the kids were quite young, but I hope they remember that we loved people no matter how they looked or the language they spoke, and that we in turn were loved by strangers. I hope they don't lose that sense of the world being big and small at the same time.
My prayer is that these precious memories, truths and worldviews will take root and blossom in my children's lives, and that when they look back and remember, the sweet will outweigh the sad...
I hope they remember the bat walks we've taken at twilight, even putting pillows down on the path by our creek, so we can more comfortably enjoy the interesting creatures swooping over our heads...
... the countless hours we've spent reading all kinds of books together, a sweet bedtime routine and a way to pass long hours in the car. Little Women, Watership Down, Narnia, Lord of the Rings, The Penderwicks, Huck Finn, Tales of the Kingdom, Roll of Thunder Hear My Cry, Anne of Green Gables...
... the walks we've taken in the snow, enjoying our footprints, watching the falling flakes, sliding on icy surfaces...
... many hours at Pohick Creek, wading, climbing 'The Boulder,' spotting snakes, hiking for hours, and even creating sparks by throwing rocks at a boulder at twilight...
... trips to the beach in almost every eastern seaboard state as well as California, Canada, and other countries, jumping waves together (even when I wore an XXL swimsuit), building tunnels and castles in the sand, seeing sharks and jellyfish and ghost crabs, watching sunrises and sunsets, collecting kelp...
... songs sung together, loudly with our stereo or radio playing, softly with my guitar at bedtime, in harmony with extended family as Grandpa expertly played guitar, in church every week...
... homemade meals made with love, bringing us together at almost every meal, pleasing our senses as we've smelled bread baking and tasted cinnamon rolls, African stew, or hand-crafted pizza...
... that I said "I'm sorry" when I'd messed up or hurt them, and that I said "I love you" and gave hugs at least every night...
... being encouraged in their gifts, being spoken of proudly, being told they're loved no matter how well or badly they do at something...
... the freedom they've had to explore, take risks, enjoy creation, and be themselves...
... the changes I've made in better eating and finally exercising on a daily basis. Maybe the weight I lost and the health I gained will be an inspiration to them when they face something tough, or they have to decide between a healthy or unhealthy habit...
... the fun of hospitality and the joy we had in hosting friends and strangers for overnights and meals...
... the love of extended family, and the many visits they've had with cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents, great-grandparents, and great-aunts and -uncles. I know it all starts to blend together, and they may not remember the specifics, but I hope they remember they are cherished and rooted...
... that learning can be spontaneous and fun, and stem from the very world around us, that understanding history is key to moving forward in a healthier way, that math is crucial in every walk of life, that science is a wonderful exploration of the breathtaking world in which we live, that art and music are the languages of the soul, that the written and spoken word are precious and world-changing...
... that the Church is beautiful in its diversity. We've worshiped in Mennonite, Lutheran, Presbyterian, Baptist, Anglican, Pentecostal, Methodist, Covenant, Christian & Missionary Alliance, non-denominational, traditional and contemporary, 'high' and 'low,' Scottish, English, and Jordanian churches, in English, Arabic and Spanish, and there's been truth and beauty in each one...
... the respect we tried to always show to those who served us, and also the honor we gave to people in or from other countries. Our time overseas was when the kids were quite young, but I hope they remember that we loved people no matter how they looked or the language they spoke, and that we in turn were loved by strangers. I hope they don't lose that sense of the world being big and small at the same time.
My prayer is that these precious memories, truths and worldviews will take root and blossom in my children's lives, and that when they look back and remember, the sweet will outweigh the sad...
2 comments:
So many beautiful things! It's a good reminder to me to look for the good things that are happening also.
It is my hope & prayer too, that my kids will remember the good things more than the bad. Before I was even willing to have kids, I had to come to the point of trusting God that he *could* (no guarantees, of course) make these kids turn out ok in spite of having me as a mom. :}
So many beautiful things! It's a good reminder to me to look for the good things that are happening also.
It is my hope & prayer too, that my kids will remember the good things more than the bad. Before I was even willing to have kids, I had to come to the point of trusting God that he *could* (no guarantees, of course) make these kids turn out ok in spite of having me as a mom. :}
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