Worship and Sorrow

Our new church had an evening of worship singing last night (with the intent of making a c.d. soon), and I was so excited to attend. I’ve really appreciated the music on Sunday mornings at The Falls Church, and loved the thought of an extra evening of singing! It didn’t quite turn out like I thought…

My biggest disappointment was the large number of songs I didn’t know. Of course I still appreciated the words and enjoyed the music, but it’s kind of hard to sing along if you don’t even know the music! (Especially if it’s being recorded!) I go through this every time I move and begin worshipping at a new church. Sunday mornings seem easier, though, than an entire night of unfamiliar worship songs.

I was also struck with a feeling of sorrow – missing my recent churches in Oxford and Amman, and the music that I’d grown to love there. The thought occurred to me, “I actually don’t want a c.d. of TFC music as much as I wish I had c.d.’s of Magdalen Road Church and Oasis songs, to remind me of churches I love." That’s always been a dream of mine: to have recorded music from the various youth groups and churches that have been important to me over the course of my life.

It was a great experience, of course, to worship with hundreds of fellow Jesus-followers. Most of the time, I was focused on our amazing God, and relished the Scriptures read and the glimpse of future heavenly worship. I also reveled in the incredible drum-playing (yes, I'm partial to drums, especially African ones!) and other expertise by guest musicians. It was an aural delight and I’m not sorry I went. But I did come away sad and a bit melancholy. It’s not easy to continually move, especially when it means leaving behind dearly loved churches and friends…