What I Like About Living in Oxford, England

Hearing so many languages, everywhere I go (French and Arabic seem to be some common ones)
Convenient public transportation
Historical significance everywhere!
Learning about famous local authors (Lewis Carroll, Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, etc.)
Being relatively close to London and the ocean
Different UK accents
Always being offered tea
Bike lanes
Beautiful gardens
Amazing architecture
Itsy-bitsy cars
Elderflower-flavored soda
Fizzy lemonade
Ethnic restaurants (even though I never eat at them!!)
Sidewalks and pedestrian crossings
Environmental awareness (recycling and bring-your-own bags at the store)
Fun spelling like: tyres, kerb, pyjamas, neighbour, centre, and realise
Having so many neighbors right around me
Diversity of churches
The Thames and Cherwell Rivers -- waterfowl, walking paths, lots of boats
Freecycle
Concerts and plays (though I don't go to those either!)
Being able to cycle to my store, shop, and come back in under an hour (but I can't carry much on the bike!)
Our church (we love, love, love our church!!!)
New friends

Rear Garden: Stress Release Valve

It's not warm and it's not sunny today, but my kids are in the rear garden regardless. Thank you, Lord!!! I'm starting to realize a big part of my frustration these past few months was probably due to having my 3 loud, active children crammed into my small house with me. Having some peace and quiet as they play outside is just wonderful!!

Our garden is all gravel, but a horse pasture adjoins it and there is a bit of dirt by the fence. It still amazes me how creative my kids can be with so few material things. Today they're collecting supplies to build a house (gravel, rocks, pieces of wood, "concrete"), and yesterday they were working on creating their own pond. Perhaps they were inspired by the presentation on amphibians we went to last week, in which it was stressed over and over again how important ponds are.

They come back in with filthy clothes, and manage to get dirt all over the floor. But it is so worth it!!! They're happy and I'm happy! You can't beat that!

Recent Thanksgiving

I'm thankful for:

1. Josiah being okay, even after he fell down our entire flight of stairs and landed with a bloody head.
2. Ethan's delight in coloring. He bends over his paper in serious concentration, as though he's doing a masterpiece.
3. Naomi's accomplishment in learning how to read. She's doing great!
4. My neighbor Sarah... her letting me join her in an online grocery order, her encouragement, her having me over for tea and toast...
5. Steve's hard work at learning to read Arabic. Everyday is a challenge for him, an uphill struggle. But he's seeking help and persevering.
6. The sweet ways in which Naomi and Josiah talk to Ethan when they're playing with him or helping him.
7. Baths -- the kids have so much fun with just water and a few plastic toys!
8. My new bike -- it has really helped me get around this past week. I can't believe how much faster cycling is than walking!
9. Hot water bottles -- my feet would be freezing every night without them =)
10. Flexible, temporary, part-time work at Pembroke College. I enjoy the company of other women, and the chance to get paid for typing on a computer!

Anniversary Date

Last week Steve and I celebrated 9 years of marriage, in the same city where he proposed to me in May 1999. Nine years is a drop in the bucket compared to some, but a milestone compared to many. I'm grateful for Steve's constant patience, encouragement, and tender love. He is faithful and respectful and such a gift to me!

For our anniversary, he brought home a dozen roses, of mixed colors. I think they're the best flowers I've received in years!! I was thrilled! We also asked a friend to come stay with our kids so we could go out to dinner. We went to a Mexican cafe in city centre for our main course and to the Eagle and Child pub for dessert.


Mexican food is not easy to find here in England, but we were impressed with The Mission. Their prices were very reasonable, the quantity was fairly large by British standards, and the taste was delicious! Guacamole was a highlight.


The Eagle and Child is a pub that was frequently used as a meeting place for a group of writers known as the Inklings. C.S. Lewis and Tolkien were among them, and as we love these two authors, we enjoy eating where they ate. (We also first went there while engaged.) A friend had recommended the sticky toffee pudding and we thoroughly enjoyed it as our dessert!

Here's to my loving husband, Steve, and many more years of marriage yet to come...

Sing Your Praise to the Lord

While down with the flu and sinusitis a few weeks ago, I lost my voice. I was annoyed to go through advent and Christmas without being able to sing carols. I missed reading books aloud to the kids. I couldn't sing songs as I put my three to bed.

I wasn't ill too long, but even after recovering my speaking voice, I still could not sing. I faced another Sunday of church when I couldn't outwardly participate in the worship music. I eventually could poorly sing just for my kids, but it wasn't fun because I felt weak and couldn't reach my normal range of notes.

Today I attended All Saints' Church in Peckham, London, with my friends Becky, Simon and Claire. We must have already been in our second or third praise song when I suddenly realized what a novelty it was that I was singing -- with gusto and joy! I was so happy to be able to join people of diverse races and ethnicities in lively adoration of a great God. I was so grateful to have my singing voice back!

We sang of the Lamb upon the throne, and I tried to picture Christ as John described him in Revelation. I imagined saints from around the world, and from all generations, worshiping just as we were this morning. I thank God for his unending love and his perfect sacrifice. I thank Him for the privilege it is to praise Him.

So thankful...

The past six months have been challenging in many ways. For the first time, I experienced being the sole breadwinner, as well as living with family for an extended amount of time. Also for the first time, I moved across the world still not knowing where I'd actually live when I got there. Normal life has been challenging as the kids seem to fight a lot and complain a lot, and I struggle with my usual tendencies toward anger.

BUT -- I am so thankful!

I'm thankful that when Steve was unemployed, I had work that I enjoyed. I even liked getting away from the kids for a while.

I'm thankful that living with Steve's parents was a positive experience. I loved sharing housework and getting to know them better. Those days will be treasured for years.

I'm thankful that ever since the minute we arrived in England, God has been caring for us through dear Christians, Peter and Gwyneth Leaver, as well as others in our church. We didn't know each other previously, but now they feel like family! The Leavers drove us from Heathrow to their home in Oxford, housed us for two+ weeks, housed my mom for 1+ week, drove me to Asda (a big store) so I could buy a bunch of start-up things for our new house, put up with my loud kids, shared the cooking with us, and now are going to help us move in to our own place.

I'm thankful that my kids have been as flexible as they have been, though I often forget what turmoil they must feel from having moved so much in the past month. I'm thankful for their smiles, their laughter as they chat privately together, their creative drawings, their zest for life as they dance in the autumn leaves or shout excitedly because we're riding a bus.

I'm thankful that tomorrow we're moving in, and that my mom has been here to help watch the kids while I've been doing business. I've loved her company and will miss her when she leaves in a few days.

And last but not least, I am overwhelmingly thankful for the sweet way God is encouraging us through friends and family who are praying for us and giving us gifts to help with our high costs. I have felt so blanketed in love, when I've heard that friends in VA miss us and pray for us, or that friends elsewhere are sending us sacrificial checks.

Thank you, God, for your very many blessings...

Travel Trials and Thanks

We had an interesting time trying to travel with nine large boxes/duffels, five carry-ons, five backpacks and one computer bag (and everyone wearing mulitple jackets!). Air India tried making us pay more money because some pieces were overweight, but when they saw us take items out (to lower the weight) instead of paying the money, I think they decided it wouldn't be worth their time to watch us do that to every single overweight bag.

Besides the stress of checking in, and knowing that they weren't happy about our amount of luggage, the hardest part was going through security!! We all had to take off our shoes and extra jackets. We had to break down our stroller, take out laptops, empty pockets, and get three children to go through the detector. Then we had to get ourselves together again afterwards. We were some of the last people at our gate!

Thankfully, though, we had an incredibly nice airline attendant help us when we got to the gate. She offered to check in as many items as we wanted, for no extra charge, so we got rid of our suitcases and some backpacks. Also thankfully, the flight was quite empty (which is surely why they were lenient at the gate) and we all got to lie down to sleep. Josiah and Ethan opted for the ground instead of the seats!!

We faced another struggle when we got to London, as we now had to transport all of our original stuff through the airport till we could meet up with our friends. We almost hired a porter service, but did it on our own in the end. Steve pushed/pulled two luggage carts overflowing with our stuff, I pushed a cart and pulled the stroller (also loaded down), and the kids pulled carry-on size suitcases on wheels. I wish I had a photo -- it was amazing!

Once our friends, the Leavers, met us, it was smooth sailing. They helped us to the carpark, and all our stuff fit fine in the mini-bus we'd rented. We're storing the majority of our things at the church, and appreciate the two rooms the Leavers are letting us have in their home. Now we just need to find our own place so we can settle in!

Travel Fun

We've made our last long car journey and are now settled in Naperville, IL, with good friends Kevin and Jen Sandahl. The past 12 days have seen us on the road for a total of 36 hours, driving through West Virginia, Ohio, Michigan, Indiana, Illinois, Wisconsin and Minnesota! It's been fun in so many ways, despite the hours cooped up in the car and despite adjusting to six different sets of beds!

Highlights of the kids have been:
*enjoying the sand of Lake Erie at Luna Pier
*playing with many friends' dogs (Ginger, Lily)
*petting many cats
*meeting new & old friends and playing together (Jhoey, Rowan, Ian, Anna, Alex, Sophia, Charlotte, Keiryn, Bethany, Anna)
*roasting marshmallows over a campfire in Kirschners' backyard
*playing hide and seek with cousin Rowan
*frosting pumpkin-shaped cookies and eating them!
*listening to books on tape like "Soup" and "Ramona"

Highlights of us adults have been:
*Catching up with old friends
*Playing games like Caylus and Rage with Blyths and Murrays
*Eating Ethiopian food in Chicago
*Having an early Thanksgiving dinner with Blyths
*Laughing with our kids during silly family moments
*Finally submitting our visa applications and being told they'll be done in a few days!
*Being prayed for by so many friends

Refreshing Art

I am realizing more and more how important it is for me to spend some time being artistic on a regular basis. It can be anything from designing and painting shirts, to face-painting, to sketching, coloring or calligraphy. When I leave this part of me high and dry, I get serious and depressed. But when I've just done an hour of face-painting or made a wall-hanging for my nephew, I feel renewed. I've not only used a different part of my brain, I've created something that brings joy and something that reflects who I am.

Freedom to Imagine

I am constantly amazed at how creative children can be with little structure and few supplies. My one-year-old now loves playing with small toy animals and vehicles, but today, even a razor cap became a “car” for him to push around on the bathtub edge (don’t worry – Dad had possession of the razor!!).

And while the kids all enjoy the toy barn at the library, they really have quite a good time without one at home. Ethan has figured out how to balance plastic horses on a box’s edge, and Josiah creates “zoos” every chance he gets. He groups his animals by types and puts each kind in a special spot (under a chair, on top of a box).

When they run around outside, they also need very few toys. They’ve got a slide and some trikes, but mostly they catch bugs, play in puddles, watch the cows, run down our hill, and play with their few toys. They can make any type of string into a leash for a stuffed animal, and turn any stick into a sword, hobby-horse or a shovel to collect worms. Oh that I were so creative!

I’m thankful that God made humans in his image. The kids and I have been talking a lot about animals lately as we’ve seen quite a few in the past few weeks: fox, turtle, possum, woodchuck, caterpillar, grasshopper. We talk about the distinction between mammals and other types. Naomi asked the other day if we are animals, and I had the joy of telling her “yes” in the scientific definition, but that we are “different” because of God’s grace. He made us creative, emotional, communal, intelligent, and communicative, and we are set apart from all other beings!

Thank you, Lord, for children who remind me of you in so many ways.

I’m Thankful For…

A wonderful unexpected 6 extra days with my parents before they returned to Nigeria.

A pastor in our church who is giving Steve and me marriage counseling. He is wise, understanding, and our meetings have been helpful.

Two girlfriends who have each recently invited me to “girl” things (for the 1^st time in 2 yrs)

Steve’s Arabic professor giving him extra tutoring on the side.

Eclipse Memories

On February 20, there was a full lunar eclipse, and thankfully my brother called me to let me know! I would have missed it otherwise. It was a fairly clear night, cold but bearable. Naomi was awake in bed so I asked if she wanted to watch the moon with me. We put coats and hats on, made hot chocolate, and wrapped up in a blanket on our porch. I found our binoculars, too, so we could get a closer view of the moon’s surface.

Naomi was tickled to be up late with me and she called it “girl-time” since Steve and Josiah didn’t want to watch with us (at least, not for more than a couple minutes – it was cold and Josiah had been fast asleep in bed). I not only enjoyed the beauty of the night sky and the eclipse, but relished the special role of being Mom. I loved having time with my little girl, when we could cozy up together and share a memorable event. I loved showing her something new and explaining the science of it to her.

We watched until the eclipse was full and then came inside to check on it again from our couch. I suggested we take a nap and then look at it later to see how it had changed. I can’t remember the last time I had lain down with my daughter snuggled on my chest. She started laughing and told me that it was funny to have her head move up and down with each of my breaths. We got the giggles for a few minutes and then settled down and actually both fell asleep.

We never did see more of the eclipse. Steve put her to bed an hour later, at which point I also crawled into my own bed, tired but happy from a special sky-gazing night.

I’m Thankful For…

My patient husband, who has put up with my clutter for 8 years!

The way light changes color at sunrise and sunset

Jesus’ love and compassion for the unlovable – the demon-possessed man, the “sinner” who poured perfume on his feet, the woman who had bled for 12 years

Mom’s recipes which are yummy and remind me of her

New friends, Nancy and Tony Nix, and a fun double date with them, bowling and eating fantastic food together

My friend Kit’s successful knee-replacement operation (in Edinburgh)

Public libraries – I wish I could get locked in by accident some weekend!

Books on tape, especially good mysteries

Laughter

God’s stunning creation, and video footage to help me see it

Fragrant smells

My daughter’s pictures drawn for me

Mentors and good friends who encourage me and model holy living

A quiet neighborhood

My cheap piano and the lovely sheet music Mom Gertz gave me

Josiah’s enthusiasm for my cooking

Ethan’s easy and beautiful laugh. I love one-year-olds!!!!

2/3/08 Restful Weekend

As much as I love being with people and having company over to our house, I’ve really enjoyed the relaxation and solitude of this weekend without guests or plans. Spending Friday night and Saturday at Gertzes’ house was very restful. I wasn’t faced with my own never-ending chores, but could enjoy their treadmill, Jacuzzi bathtub and deck with a mountain view.

Even today, which for most people involved SuperBowl plans, was peaceful. We took the kids to a favorite playground after church, which they loved. We took naps. We taught the kids an “adult” game called Carcassonne and had a nice time playing it as a family. We ate popcorn, drank candy-cane cocoa, and the kids said that it was a “special night.” I don’t even know who won the SuperBowl. Who cares?!

Happy birthday, Jonathan!

My little brother was born 29 years ago today. Happy birthday! He was a fun growing up. I remember dumpster-jumping together, making "clubhouses" from the treasures we found. We would play school together and make up stories with our stuffed animals. We both liked to sing and read. I remember Jonathan sharing tidbits of information that he gleaned from reading the encyclopedia (for fun!)

We got a bit closer when I was a senior and he a freshman in high school. My parents and sister lived in the U.S. for 5 months without us, while Jonathan and I lived with a missionary family in Nigeria. He says now that he was encouraged by having me there with him, at a time that was scary and lonely for both of us.

I'll never forget the way he starred in "Journey to Oz" that year at Hillcrest. He was the Scarecrow who not only sang fantastically, but did delightfully flexible and funny movements as he came to life (not always standing very well since he was made of straw)! I was so proud of him! After I left for college, he continued his acting and musical efforts, and I always enjoyed hearing recordings of him.

Now we're both parents. He married my wonderful sister-in-law Lori in August 2002, and now they have two cute little boys. As an , I've enjoyed visits with him, playing board games, talking about all sorts of things, hiking, reminiscing, singnig in my sister's wedding together, hearing him read aloud (his specialty is "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"). He visited us right before we moved to Scotland and helped me sort and pack my bedroom clutter. I visited him after the births of both his boys. It's fun seeing him be a dad!

So here's to you, Jonathan! I love you and wish we lived closer. Happy birthday!

Friendship

I spoke with a friend "Molly" recently about the nature of "temporary" friendships. She was describing to me how she had become really close to a neighbor, to the point of sharing meals and calling daily. She felt like they were almost sisters. Then Molly's friend told her that because Molly was planning to live in her present home only temporarily (a few years, due to husband's grad school) she did not want to be close friends with her anymore. She and her husband had decided they wanted to pursue friendships only with people who were going to settle down permanently in their town. Molly didn't qualify. This has been heartbreaking for her, and it baffled me.

I've been "temporary" all my life, and the truth is that each of us is "temporary" since we actually don't know what the future holds. We can't tell ahead of time when life circumstances will be such that we need to move. We might think we've settled, but it's never for sure.

And then there are people like me. Eleven years (with some 6-12 month gaps) is the longest I've lived in one area. I've lived on three continents, and even now, do not know what my address will be in 5 months. To think that I would be rejected from friendship because of this makes me very sad. I understand the fears and sorrows involved, but think that the love is worth it.

Right now I'm in a place where I sense that possible friends are purposely avoiding getting to know me. But this is the first time I've ever really felt this kind of resistance. For the most part, I've made friends quickly and they've stayed good friends for life.

A special case in point was the year I lived in Scotland. We knew we were only going to be there for twelve months. We found a church right away and told them we'd be there for a year. Yet people still reached out to us in an amazing way and blessed us with their genuine friendship. Dear women opened up to me without waiting the prerequisite months of "getting acquainted." I now have forever friends in Scotland -- all because they loved me despite my being temporary.

It's actually a benefit in my eyes. I have friends all over the world. I have people to visit when I travel. I have many who I can talk with at length, praying for each other and laughing as we catch up. Thank you, God, for the gift of good friends.

Small Encouragements

Yesterday it warmed up to 45 degrees, so my kids decided to have a "picnic" outside on the "big hill" in our yard. They gathered together their favorite stuffed animals, a doll stroller, a blanket, plates, cups, and then asked me for food. I gave them oyster crackers and one cookie each.

They asked if they could eat their entire lunch outside at their picnic, so I said "Sure!" I made peanut butter and graham cracker "sandwiches," washed some apples and peeled one for Ethan. We loved being outside!

Ethan had a hard time sitting and walking on the hill. He kept tipping over! But I stuck by him and helped him walk on the slant. He loved seeing our cows and tasting dirt and grass again.

The older kids climbed fences, ran around, and collected dried up seed pods. I was grateful they could use their energy and noise outside instead of driving me crazy inside!

And I used my free weekend minutes to call some dear friends from Illinois and Scotland. I talked with five wonderful women and felt so refreshed by catching up with them and hearing their voices. Thank you, God, for small encouragements like "warm" weather and friends!

Ethan Turns One!

One year ago, I gave birth to my baby boy, Ethan Andrew. I went to the hospital first thing in the morning for an amniocentesis, having not eaten breakfast because I wasn't sure if the procedure required a fast or not. I asked my sister if she could stay with my kids for "just 2 hours" until I got back. She agreed even though she was sick.

I never did come home that day! The doctor decided to induce me since I was already at the hospital. Poor Saralynn had to watch my kids for hours, until Steve's mom could relieve her.

I hadn't wanted to be induced or have a C-section, but because my second child had been 12 pounds 10 ounces at birth and gotten stuck on the way out, we opted to deliver early to prevent that from happening again. The pitocin worked well and my labor progressed nicely. At 6 cm, I asked for an epidural (my first after two natural childbirths!) and was thrilled that it killed the pain.

I began pushing and Ethan headed toward the light. But then the nurse said he was coming face-up and forehead first. She called the doctor and the doctor agreed, saying this was a problem. Uh-oh. He gave me the option of forceps or C-section, but told me he didn't have much experience with forceps and leaned toward the section himself. Sigh.

So after two natural childbirths, I had my first pitocin, epidural and C-section, all in one birth. Thankfully Ethan Andrew was delivered safely at 11 PM, and though the wound hurt insanely for 24 hours, I healed well. Ethan nursed well, and after the first four (LONG) months, slept well. We have delighted in our cute and happy third child, and thank the Lord constantly for him. What a gift he is to us.

Happy birthday, Ethan!

Halloween 2007

Steve and I have slightly disagreed about celebrating Halloween over the years. I've been more eager to dress up, trick-or-treat, and carve jack-o-lanterns than he has. This year I thought we'd avoid the norms since we live out in the sticks. But the kids' friends asked what they were dressing up as, and the moms asked me if I was taking the kids to the downtown trick-or-treating (to the shops during daylight).

So I let the kids use their costumes from last year and we made papier-mache pumpkin buckets again. We went into town in mid-afternoon and waited in a long line for a free horse-drawn carriage ride. Then we walked around with a few friends from church and received candy from local businesses, which just thrilled the kids.

The highlight, though, was going to a church's "autumn fest" in the evening. I left Ethan at home with Steve, and took Naomi and Josiah. The church had a bunch of games set up that were simple and perfect for little ones. Both kids had fun playing the games (Naomi's favorite was throwing balls through a hanging hula hoop, and Josiah's was knocking down a pyramid of cans using a ball) and were tickled to get tickets (especially when I said they'd be worth a prize later).

Naomi especially agreed that getting her prizes was even better than getting candy. She picked out a make-up kit and a pink purse. Josiah picked cars, frogs and snakes. They've been playing with them all day today!

I'm thankful for a local church that endeavors to give kids a safe place to have fun on Halloween. And I'm thankful for a fun day with my kids! In Naomi's words, "Mom, at the beginning of this day, I did not know we were going to do all this fun stuff!"

Country Living – Oct. 27

I love my home. I love seeing Ethan look out every window in the hope of seeing a cow and I love hearing him say his first word “bbb” (which means “animal” and sounds like a mooing cow). I love driving to a school playground and stopping on the way to see and pet horses. I love waking up on Saturday morning and seeing thirty cows out my kitchen window. I love watching my husband and kids pet them.

I love the rolling hills and being in the Shenandoah Valley. I love the woods, with the leaves changing colors, and I love the farm fields – wide, empty spaces that breathe life back into me after years of crowded urban living. I love the quiet, the stars, the singing birds. I love watching my kids catch crickets, chase butterflies, and hold frogs.

I’m enjoying it while it lasts, for I don’t know when we’ll leave. Thank you, Lord, for your amazing creation.